Are we in a gay sports bar?
Me too!
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
