Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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