Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Girls should come with a carfax report
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize