The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
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