AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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