You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
