i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
