On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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