Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
