Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
