I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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