I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I just want nice things and good sex
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
