Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
