she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
