ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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