i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize