On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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