Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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