The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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