you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
