Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
should my penis look like a turkey
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize