This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
