Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
