Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
