dude i'm inner monologue high
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize