He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Less talking, more tequila
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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