u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
