Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
