What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
