I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
