My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
