Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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