i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
You have to summon your inner elephant
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize