i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
