He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
whose ass print is on the piano?
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
