just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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