we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize