Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
babies were throwing up all over the place
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Randomize
