Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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