Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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