why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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