So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
