How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
