He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
