so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
