i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
