left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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