Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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