Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
