If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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